Thanks Paul Joseph Watson, we’re looking forward to our free Swedish holiday!

Far-right editor Paul Joseph Watson of conspiracy site Infowars has been taken up on his Twitter pledge to pay any journalist willing to visit the ‘crime ridden migrant suburbs of Malmo’ in Sweden, an alleged hotbed of terrorism. Quite frankly, this writer would sleep in a skip for a free holiday.

I have slumped Corbyn-style in the ends of carriages as part of an Interrail trip. On the same trip I thought I was boarding a train to Vienna and ended up on the border of Romania. It was an easy mistake. ‘Gyor’ is a place between Budapest and Vienna. ‘Gyors’ means ‘fast’ in an unspecified direction…

I have also been called a douche by a fellow hostel-dweller in Paris as he went out for a shower. O the perils faced by a budget traveller. If I can be this much out of place just next door, surely I should be fearing the Norse land?

Malmo

“Any journalist claiming Sweden is safe; I will pay for travel costs & accommodation for you to stay in crime ridden migrant suburbs of Malmo” – these were Watson’s words via Twitter. Well, to be honest, cheers mate! My bigger concern is what airline you’re going to give us. In fact, I think the British Airways First Class champagne lounge may also be a hub of radicalism and crime…

You know what other dangers you face in Sweden? Bears. What’s worse? Ikea? In fact, I’m keen to make it a personal challenge to find a homosexual, immigrant bear to really scare the alt-right.

 

Anyway, WTF is wrong with Sweden??

Isn’t Sweden basically one of the world’s most friendly countries? It is a neutral country. Abba are Swedish. You can pick up sheath knives and axes in town centre shops like Clas Ohlson because they know not to run with them.

The reason the right wing of Trump and Breitbart slate Sweden so is because of it’s record as a welcoming home for refugees and migrants. It has a very low population density with the means and infrastructure to support this system. The birth rate is decreasing and the population ageing! Sweden doesn’t even base statistics on ethnicity, which sounds sensible. Surely this is the uncontrolled tide that scares the alt-right so? It is believed the muslim population of Sweden will grow from a whole 5% to 10% by 2030. Unthinkable!

There have been reports of an increase in antisemitism in Malmo, but the double-digits reported seem to resemble one of many British university clashes between Israel and Palestine societies. Maybe Paul Joseph Watson needs to pay penniless students to monitor and tweet from campus each day?

The whole idea of dodgy suburbs is certainly difficult to pin down. My mum, born a Londoner a fair while ago, gave me a stern look of concern telling me I need to be careful where I choose to live if I want to go out in the evening. I was looking at Bermondsey! God knows what she may think of Brixton, lest I be assaulted with falafel.

For now though, having visited Sweden myself it remains an unspoilt and beautiful country. Now to Wembley for some meatballs…

 

 

 

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